Sunday, December 28, 2014

Crescent's 2015 Wishlist of things that will NEVER happen

As 2014 closes, we begin to look forward to 2015 and all the new things that are on the horizon. Last week, I went over several of the things I am looking forward to 2015 that will probably happen at some point before the year closes. This week, I'm looking at all the things that I really REALLY wish would happen, but am pretty much resigned to admitting that there is no way in hell it will actually occur in order of most likely of the unlikely to Santa Claus is sooner to be proven to exist than this ever happening. Let's start this boulevard of broken dreams with:

 Breath of Fire Trilogy

THIS is Ryu.... Bitches.
Aw, the Breath of Fire series. Anyone who was a serious RPG fan during the SNES and PS1 era should at least be aware of this lesser known franchise from Capcom. Famous for being a very traditional RPG with some very untraditional mechanics like a protagonist who can turn into a FREAKIN' DRAGON! But after the departure from the series formula that was known as Dragon Quarter, Breath of Fire has pretty much vanished from existence. So what better way to reinvigorate the franchise than to remake the first three games as "The Breath of Fire Trilogy." This will not only give Capcom a chance to revive a long dormant series, but also refine the more rough elements of the earlier games. Like BoF1 being completely unbalanced, BoF2 having one of the worse English translations ever, and BoF3 having in game sprites look NOTHING like their official artwork (I know the reason for this, so don't tell me). And also would put three of the best RPGs ever made (Okay, TWO of the best RPGs ever made and BoF1) into a single package (preferably a 3DS card). Now, why BoF1-3 and not BoF4? Well, I'm not as big a fan of BoF4 as others, but the main reason is because BoF1-3 all have strong ties to each other, so much so that all three games can be thought of as the three parts to one trilogy, while 4 went in a different direction and had very little thematic ties to the other games. This would be a great way for Capcom to show long time fans of the series that they haven't forgotten this hidden gem of a franchise.


Sakura Wars Collection

Ichiro Ogami's wedding photo.
Thanks to a game I recently played (You might know which one), I've gotten THIS SONG stuck in my head again, and thus far the only way to resolve this without losing my sanity is to demand that SEGA does SOMETHING with the Sakura Wars series. My suggestion: Release a Sakura Wars collection. All 4 of the Ogami games (HELL throw in Sakura Wars: So Long, My Love while your at it) into a single collection and lastly FINALLY RELEASE THE DAMN THING IN THE US! It's sad that out of the entire franchise we only got one, ONE freakin' game released over here (Yet we got most of the Anime adaptations during it's prime... weird). I know marketing a dating sim in the US is a hard sell, and with the amount of text you will have to go though to localize it will increase the costs, but if making a return is the problem hell release it digitally with only the Japanese Voice track. I'm sure the Sakura Wars audience would actually prefer that route. And lastly: Hashire, Kousoku no Teikoku Kageki-Dan! Unare, Shougeki no Teikoku Kageki-Dan!

Anita Sarkeesian FINALLY Stops

Seriously, this entire Feminism crap needs to stop. I mean, I appreciate the views and traffic I get everytime Anita does something truly stupid, but really this joke has gone on long enough. Her arguments have more holes than a collection of wiffle balls, she has demonstrated that she has no knowledge about the media she proclaims to be a fan of, and she doesn't even have any credentials that would make her observations ANYWHERE near academic. Yet, the media is giving her non-stop praise, numerous speaking engagements (where all she ever says is "I'm harassed, pity me."), and no one is even allowed to say ANYTHING even REMOTELY contrary to her position. The divide between Gamer and Gamer Media seems impossibly wide, to the point where several gaming websites have declared that "Gamers are Dead." The scary part is that this has gone on long enough that we can start seeing video games being morphed to fit this new "Feminist Approved" mold. And those games are the sort of things that I NEVER want to play. But I know that she will never stop, and that everyone around her will make sure her rose petal path is completely clear, no matter how many gamers they have to trample on to appease HER sensibilities. But there is ONE thing that is more unlikely to happen than this and that is:

Mega Man Legends 3

Release Date: Never.
If there is one entity that crushes more dreams of gamers Anita Sarkeesian, than that entity is Capcom. I know it's been years since MML3's cancelation, but as a Mega Man fan, I can't help but feel like one of my life long Video Game Heroes is being treated like crap. I mean, what does it say about a company's respect for their IP, when another company seems to give THEIR mascot more attention and care than they do themselves. In the past few months to years, the only place you hear Mega Man news and receive Mega Man games, is NINTENDO! It's not just Mega Man in Smash Bros., It's also all the Mega Man sales and features in the eShop. Mega Man has his one Puzzle Swap in the Mii Plaza. And there has been entire Mega Man centered Nintendo Minutes on Nintendo's Youtube channel. Meanwhile, what has Capcom been doing with the robot that has been the face of their company for decades? Well, two things: Cancel his games, and pretend that they only have Street Fighter, Monster Hunter, and Phoenix Wright. While reviving Mega Man Legends 3 is my dream of dreams in this scenario, Capcom just needs to do SOMETHING with the Blue Bomber for me to be happy. Something important, something big. A cameo and a fan made game isn't going to cut it. We NEED to see Mega Man return in all of his glory. And if Capcom isn't going to do it, then they better hand him off to Nintendo and Nintendo better hire Comcept or Inticreates to advise them.

There you go. Have a Happy New Year, and let's hope 2015 has more gaming instore than 2014.

-Crescent, Seriously, is this REALLY so hard?

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