Anime Review: Redline

You know, it is really hard to come up with an opening paragraph to a review when you have an image like that to start with. I mean, really. What can I say that would be able to match that in terms of "What the Fuck am I looking at." And honestly, after watching the movie this is the least of the "What the Fuck am I looking at" you will experience.

You got have massive balls to enter a futuristic race in a Transam.

"Redline." It is the biggest, baddest, most dangerous race in the entire universe held every 5 years. Racers all over the galaxy trick out their vehicles with barely legal engines, illegal modifications, and VERY illegal weapons just to compete in this race, because in Redline ANYTHING goes. And this year's race is even more dangerous than usual as Redline's venue is the planet Roboworld, a militaristic dictatorship that despises this kind of sport and has openly declared that anyone competing in the race will be shot dead by their army. After a disastrous crash at the qualifying race Yellowline, "Sweet" JP gets his shot at Redline after two qualifying racers bowed out after learning that competing in Redline would include more than just dodging bullets from other racers. But can JP compete with only a Transam, no weapons, and a record of fixing races? Will the audience care by the end of the movie? Watch Redline to find out.

A sweet ride, a hot chick, and the largest pompadour known to man. JP's got everything.

Redline is the kind of movie you'd watch if you thought that Gurren Lagann was a bit too restrained. The movie starts out set to 11 and just tries everything it can think of to crank it up even further, so much so that they seem to break the space-time continuum 7 times before lunch. There is so much going on in the first few minutes that you go from wondering how any of it is physically possible to not caring in about 2.38 seconds. I mean, when you have dog people launching missiles that look like Bullet-Bills, girls popping open their cockpit to shoot said missiles with a gun, a person skip his car across a lake like a stone, someone jumping out of their car in the middle of a race to beat up some cyborgs then run back to his car, and half of the cast of F-Zero you really just stop caring about whether or not any of it makes any kind of sense.

..........There is nothing you can really say about this.

Of course, it is that kind of over-the-top nonsense that makes having a plot really hard. I mean, they spend a long time on the set up for the race as well as giving appropriate levels of development among the cast, but towards the end the movie really just says "fuck it" and go for none stop nonsensical action. So much so that once the adrenaline runs out from the final 10 minutes of the film you are left wondering, "Wait... What the fuck was with [insert query]?"

Yeah, it is light on plot but Jesus Christ you will not care. Redline had an objective, complete over-the-top ridiculous action from start to finish. And to that end it succeeded, it never tried anything it couldn't do and it work amazingly well with what its mission statement was. Watch it if you want to see something Fucking awesome and don't care for anything like physics. Until next time.

-Crescent, And JP just ripped a hole in subspace.